i hate him. i fucking hate him. i hate him so fucking much. i want to punch him right in his big dumb face. before i start with this, i need to mention that i have a couple of girl friends, but i mainly get along with and am friends with guys. this isn’t a new thing, it’s how i’ve always been. i don’t sleep with every second guy, i just get along with them because i am one-of-the-boys.
so, after i wrote the post about “eric” and i breaking up, we got back together. things were going alright, except for all of the stupid fights. one night, we went out to a bar with a bunch of our mutual friends. he got up and went to the bar with one of the guys, the other guys went off to find girls, and the girls went to the bathroom, so i was on my own. i found one of the guys in our group and stood next to him while i typed a text to eric to find out where he was. mid-text, he comes over, hands me a drink, and storms off texting me telling me to “have him” (talking about the guy who i was standing with – who has a girlfriend). it turned into a big text-argument between us while we sat next to each other at the table with our friends, until i got tired of it, walked out, and caught a taxi home. he kept texting me calling me all kinds of names until i got tired of it, turned my phone off & went to sleep while he stayed out with everyone and got even more drunk. the next morning came and he wouldn’t stop apologizing. it was at this point, i started to regret my decision to get back with him.
a couple of weeks go by, and he starts up again about my friendship with this guy (let’s call him “roger”) that i’ve been friends with for years. i was snapchatting roger back and forward one night, then eric left the room to go & have a shower and texted me asking what was going on between roger and i, that i should just go and be with roger. i texted him back saying that he was crazy, and the thought of roger and i being together romantically is insane and hilarious. he eventually dropped it and had flowers delivered to my work a couple of days later.
then came the argument that ended us again. i’d been having the week from hell, having fights with my family at home, work was becoming massive, and my debts made me feel like i was drowning. all i wanted to do was be alone. eric knows that i like to be by myself when i get home from work and that i prefer to hang out on weekends when i’m not at work. he started to get very angry when i kept saying that i didn’t want to come over after work on this particular week, then on thursday night, i gave in and went to stay. the following morning at five in the morning, i texted my mum to say i was about to leave his house. as i hugged him goodbye, my phone went off (it was mum texting to say “ok”). i get half-way home and receive a big long text from eric going off that someone was texting me at that early of an hour & i didn’t open it while i was there with him. i told him it was my mum & he said “i don’t believe that for a second”. later that day, he posted a text post on instagram that said “no matter how good your heart is, there comes a point when you have to start treating people the way they treat you” with the middle finger emoji as the caption.
this was the end of our relationship, no official ending. he started texting me calling me all different names, accusing me of chatting up other guys. i was thinking are you fucking kidding me. i hadn’t done anything. the only thing i’d done “wrong” was not open a text from my mum. after he’d finished abusing the fuck out of me through text, i told him again that it was my mum & sent him a screenshot for proof. then later that night, i see on instagram that he’s started to follow all of these girls and like all of their photos.
i’m done. i’m so fucking done with him insecurities. i’m done with being accused of things i haven’t done. i’m done with leaving his house & wondering what he’s going to text me and go off at me about. i’m done.